Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Ben says Yes to: PERSUASION WEAR

Commercial Worth: This could end badly

We all know that subliminal messaging in advertising is banned. If it had to be banned it obviously works. Hide an image of a penis in your ad, all of a sudden sales of your product skyrocket, and no-one knows why!

Now Ben brings subliminal messaging to your regular, non-nefariously persuasive wardrobe. Eg: Going for a job interview that you really want to nail? You wear a lovely smart striped business shirt in which hidden in very tiny text is the message "I Provide Excellent Value as an Employee". Your prospective employer gets a glance whilst admiring your sense of fashion and bang! You've got the job.

Or going out with a chick you really want to nail? Wear a jacket which has the cleverly hidden message: "My Prospects as a Husband and Provider are Excellent". Or something along those lines. You get the idea.

There could be complete clothing ranges such as Get Ahead in Business Wear or Smart and Casual Relationship.

The possibilities for evil are endless. 

Smittys reaction: I really want a "This Concept is Excellent the Way it Is" suit.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Ben says Yes to: THE SHRED-O-MATIC

Commercial Worth: Awesome

Bens ideas are vomiting forth thick and pungent at the moment.

How 'bout this one; it's a thin insert that sits over the fret board of your guitar that you're learning to play, and lights up in the spots to put your fingers. You could learn chords, entire songs, even long-winded heroic solos.

Just plug in it into your computer, choose a lesson, song etc, and you'll be shhhhreding within no time. 

Having attempted to learn the guitar many times, my biggest obstacle (other than laziness) is remembering finger positions. This idea would seriously solve a major problem when first learning. Imagine all the chicks I could have gotten with my mad skills. Shame.

Smittys reaction: C'mon, if no-one with a bit of motivation picks this one up, I'll lose all faith in capitalism.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010


Sandwich Eyes
Commercial Worth: Ummm...

Ok. Having trouble getting your kids to eat your healthy, but slightly less than delicious sandwich?

Solution: Use a pair of Ben's Edible Sandwich Eyes to turn that boring sandwich into a loveable Sandwich Man. Much emulated cannibalism and hilarity ensues.

Smittys reaction: As improbable as it seems now, you'll probably see these in shops within the decade.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Ben says Yes to: BOOBS

Boob Wobblers
Commercial Worth: Good

Obviously following a train of thought, Ben thought it would be great idea to create a pair of wobblers that represent a pair of boobs. You can't argue with the logic: boobs wobble, therefore put them on wobblers.

Ben actually thought this was such a strong idea, that he got one of our designers to mock up a pair of boobie wobblers, and presented his boobs as a marketing idea to a local lads mag. 10 for enthusiasm. The marketing manager loved it, so this one's sold. Sorry.

Smittys reaction: Dude, even I have to admit, that's brilliant.

Anatomy of a Yes Man

This is Ben. He's saying Yes to the Grim Reaper.

My name is Smitty. I'm 37, work as a designer in a Sydney ad agency, and I sit next to a Yes Man.

What's a Yes Man?
In this case his name is Ben, and he's a copywriter.

In addition to Ben's Instant Advertising Headline Service, and his less popular drive to resurrect the Long Copy Ad in mainstream advertising, Ben says Yes. Yes to every thought and idea that pops into his brain. 

His philosophy is: give an idea room to grow rather than immediately shoot it down.

Every day I sit in anticipation of hearing the exciting words: "howbout this for an idea..."

I'm more of a Maybe Man (or someone Edward DeBono would classify as a Black Hat), and generally reply with "the only problem with that is..." In this blog I will document each of Ben's ideas as it forms, and my deflative reaction.

If you like an idea, make an offer. And remember: Credit Where Credit is Due.